CostumReformaWeen Night

Whatever you want to call it, it is fun to dress up.

So much so that the boys arose at 5:30 am in celebration of the day. I'm not really sure if they thought we were dressing up so early, but they were so excited you would have thought it was Christmas. Thankfully the younger two napped, but Andrew was too wound up to be still. As the day progressed, the intensity rose until they were completely frantic at 5:30 pm.

Doug came home early to help assemble the fire engine. We ate, collected our gear, got the two firemen (costumes courtesy of Nana's yardsale shopping) and a dalmation (footed sleeper converted with $.78 of black fleece) dressed without mishap, and headed out the door. We only went to 8 houses, all of which we could see from our house, but the loot was outstanding (the advantage to having neighbors of a certain age who think your children are absolutely adorable).

Andrew was ready to turn around after the third house because he was so anxious to dive into the goods. Thankfully he held out because at the next to last house the lady said, "Are you sure you got enough?" to which he replied, "Well, really I didn't" and she added a couple of extra handfuls.

Fatigue was taking over as we headed towards home, but the sight of all the candy spread on the table caused a quick revival. He lit into the M&Ms first and then he announced, "Nobody has eaten such-and-such a candy" and ate it; this was repeated over and over. I don't even want to think about how much sugar he consumed. I figure the faster it's gone, the better.

Stephen was in hog-heaven driving his fire engine, complete with flashing light and bell. Andrew rode in the back, and the puppy alternately rode and was carried. Now I know that I am his mother, but I must say he was just adorable (as you can judge from the numerous pictures) and Matthew thoroughly enjoyed himself.

(Mom, take a look at the picture of witch candy in the slides. Andrew announced, "It is the runaway pickle dressed up for Halloween as a witch."

Hands Free

In the current era of multitasking, there is a big push for hands free devices, but there are tasks that do require use of at least one hand, if not both. Somehow in his 4 1/2 years, Andrew has yet to figure this out which leads to great frustration for both of us.

This occurred this morning after we practiced cutting and he had to be reminded that the paper needed to be held with one hand while the other operated the scissors (yes, it helps to have a firm grip on the scissors as well); and after I had to remind him that he may have to lay down his book in order to use both hands to undo his pants in order to use the potty; and after I had to explain that he might need to use his hands to unsnap and unzip his pants in order to pull them back up.

He uses up what little patience I have so if anyone knows of a course that teaches "Common Sense 101," please let me know.

Nine Months

Matthew passed the nine month mark yesterday, and at his checkup this morning he weighed a whopping 15 lb. 6 oz. (no heavyweights in this family). The doctor was not concerned at all about his growth, praise the Lord! Here's what the little guy has been doing the last month:

Admiring his handsome reflection

Watching the big boys play outside

Visiting Stephen's hairstylist

Crawling all over the house

Pulling up on anything that doesn't move

He has sprouted two bottom teeth and has "practiced with a string bean" (though he wasn't much impressed). Oatios and puffed rice are our staples, supplemented with cooked chicken, beef, sweet potato and apple.

A Year Ago

After Stephen was born, I started keeping a journal for each of the boys (although I've been less and less frequent with the entries since the arrival of #3). The other day I was looking at back at what was going on a year ago, and it turned out to be one of the most mischievous events in the Hamill home history (to date).

I was 20-some-odd weeks pregnant with Matthew, and we had been working on potty training with Andrew (age 3 1/2) for a number of months. He had this strange habit of waking early in the morning to do #2, so at 5 am I hear him walking down the hall to the bathroom. In my fatigued state, I didn't give it much thought, even though a few minutes later I heard Stephen (age 2) join him.

Now to a person of clear mind, fully awake and functional it would have caused instant alarm to know that two young boys were in the bathroom alone; but remember, I was pregnant, it was early in the morning, and we had been battling various viruses for nearly 6 weeks (and would continue to do so for 4 more months).

I was in and out of consciousness, and while I had a vague thought flitting through my head that someone should check on them, it took a while to will my body out of the warm bed. Upon the hearing the sound of splashing, however, I was instantly awake and bolting (as fast as a preggo body can go) down the hall.

Oh, the sight that met my eyes: Andrew had indeed relieved himself. Then someone had thrown the wet diaper he had had on all night into the potty. Then someone had cleaned off the bathroom counter (toothbrushes, toothpaste, nail clippers, hairbrush, clean diapers) and disposed of everything in the toilet. Then they both had scoops from the bath that they were using to scoop out toilet water into the tub.

All I could say was "Go to your room," and my dear husband cleaned up the mess. It was a day that will live in infamy for sure.

Baths & Bargains

Bathtime is always a fun activity to soothe the restless urchins, and I herded the boys into the tub yesterday at 4 pm. It is practically impossible to undress Matthew as the tub is filling because he kicks and squirms so much. He loves being with the big boys, and baths are just a hoot. There is hardly room to move with three bodies and numerous containers and toys, but they have a great time together.

I was also planning my great escape (another reason for the early bath) to check out the extra 25% off clearance prices at TJMaxx. With Doug at the helm, I abandoned ship. No great deals other than the 3 pairs of Tonka undies for Stephen's stocking that I got for $1.50; it was nice, however, to get out of the four walls of the house, by myself. I did snag a new pair of all purpose shoes as I retire my stinky Chacos for the season.

Does anyone know a way to remove the less-than-desirable odor of worn Chacos?

P.S. I was looking again at the slideshow and noticed no one had wet hair - it just occurred to me that the boys were so busy playing that I never got around to actually washing them. Oh, well!

Fish Really Stinks

For Matthew that is. I made the poor decision to let Matthew try my tilapia at lunch today. (Yes, I know that Stephen is not allowed fish even though he is not allergic to it; it is a precautionary move because fish is a common allergen). I figured it would be a great source of protein for the little guy, and he loved it; unfortunately it did not agree with him. Within minutes his lips swelled and his cheeks and chin turned red. He looks more distressed in the picture than he actually was; he didn't seemed very bothered. I quickly gave him Benedryl, called the doctor, and gave him some more.

While we waited for to leave for our appointment, Andrew vacuumed and Matthew and Stephen lent moral support. He did a pretty good job.

The allergist wasn't able to provide a lot more advice (I should have waited until he was 3 to offer fish) other than to cut out fish and nuts until we see a change in his irritated skin.

His 9 month appointment is coming up next week, and my mission is to bulk him up before then. Since protein shakes are out, we may have to resort to weight lifting. At 15 lb. 12 oz., he is on track to be labeled, "Failure to Thrive" and I will not have that happen again (how demoralizing does that sound?).

Ketner's Mill

We enjoyed a fun day in the Sequatchie Valley with our friends (and fellow King College alum) the Hendersons. Their son Drew is almost 3 and Nolan is just a week younger than Matthew. The big boys played with sticks and stones, and we all enjoyed delicious BBQ and kettle corn. The weather was perfect and a good time was had by all.

There is a growing phenomenon I have noticed in public gatherings of this sort: quite a large number of people carry their pets (all dogs that I saw) in front carriers, slings, and strollers. Even one cute little old man in bibbed overalls was pushing a pink stroller with a small white dog. It reminded me of P.D. James' Children of Men. Not only were these animals being toted; on more than one occasion I heard the doting of passerbys, "Oh, how sweet." This is a normal response to wee children, but animals?! Something strange is afoot.

A Zoo-y Day

We met Ms. Suzy and Colin for a final hoorah before they head back to Switzerland. Andrew and Stephen posed with Hank, the zoo's main attraction. The kids all jumped in the canoe to explore the depths of the African jungle.

While everyone else went into the barnyard to feed the goats and pot bellied pigs, my kids preferred to dig in the gravel and watch the trains. Andrew and I counted 2 engines pulling and 1 engine pushing a load of 123 coal cars (there's our math for the day!) Here is my wild bunch of chimps.
The newest attraction at the zoo is a carousel featuring endangered animals that were carved by a local group called "Horsin' Around." The boys had a lot of trouble choosing their animals.

As soon as the music started, Stephen started crying to get off. After three passes and lots of tears, I requested the operator to stop the ride. She happily let him get down.

Andrew stayed on though I don't know that he really enjoyed the ride.

It's been interesting having a crawler in the house. You would think that after having done this twice before I'd be prepared. That is not the case. The other morning I found Matthew merrily playing with the door stop, hitting it, listening to the noise. I grab the camera and while taking pictures, I notice he got the cap of the end of the door stop and was eating it. A little while later I heard the big boys say, "Matthew is standing." I run into the living room to find him standing in front of the book shelf, holding onto a lamp cord. This morning I missed him while I was drying my hair and found him underneath the boys' bunkbed. And to top it off, he pulled off another lamp this afternoon and the lightbulb shattered all over the floor. "There's no rest for the wicked...."

Two steps forward, one step back. No, unfortunately this has nothing to do with Matthew's mobility. Tonight I discovered another offending food: soy.

That is to say, I'm pretty sure that it is soy. I put some of Stephen's Whole Soy vanilla yogurt on his back (a quarter size spot) and you can see the result: redness and lots and lots of hives. The other possibilities are rice and corn.

What'll it be next?

Beautiful People

"We can't and some of us don't. That's all there is to it."

At VBS this year, two other average people and I were talking about several Beautiful People in our church (disclaimer: there was nothing gossipy or malicious about the conversation). One of the ladies remarked, "And the thing about it is, you can't even say anything bad about them because they are nice."

There was the woman I knew in Knoxville who managed to give birth to her 3rd or 4th child without ruining her makeup or mussing her hair.

There was the Christmas cookie decorating party I attended when Andrew was 22 months and Stephen just 3 (the other children were of similar ages - the host mother having twins just 16 months old). Andrew awoke from his nap, and we headed to the party as is (he probably was wearing sweats and a fleece) only to find all but one other child in Sunday attire. For decorating cookies! They all looked like models for Just Ducky, the siblings wearing coordinating patterns and colors.

There was music class this week. In the two previous weeks there had been only one other family - a mom with a 2 year old daughter and infant son. They were average, ordinary, and nice. This week another family attended. Mom in a smart dress and leggings, the daughter in a smocked dress and coordinating hairbow, and the son in an appliqued shortall with matching polo.

So it seems Eeyore was right. Some people just have the knack for being put together at all times. They marry a beautiful spouse and produce beautiful children and wear beautiful clothes.

As for music class, I'm just thankful the boys had had a bath and managed to keep their clothes clean.

ABBA Super Trouper parody

This songwriting "skill" is another genetic quirk that Doug prays is not passed on to our children. Tonight's events with our youngest inspired the words to this song.

(Click here to play the "real" music)

"Super Pooper"

I was sick and tired of everything
When I got the kids tucked in their bedrooms
All I do is cook and read and clean
Wishing every last crumb was the last one
(Wishing every last crumb was the last one)
So imagine I was surprised to hear the loud cry
(I hear a loud cry)
Suddenly I feel a fright
(Oh suddenly I feel a fright)
It is going to be real messy
When I go in your room tonight

Tonight the
Super pooper fumes are going to find me
Rising like the sun
I don't call this fun
How I wish that it were #1
Tonight the
Super pooper fumes are going to find me
Sticky, yellow poo
Like they always do
And somewhere in the dark there's you.

No dirty diapers for a week
How can anyone save up for so long
And my life is really pretty bleak
Since I sit here composing a new song
(I sit here composing a new song)
There are moments when I think I'm going crazy
(think I'm going crazy)
But maybe it will be alright
(I'll soon be changing everything)
Everything will be so different
When I'm in your room tonight

Tonight the
Super pooper fumes are going to find me
Rising like the sun
I don't call this fun
How I wish that it were #1
Tonight the
Super pooper fumes are going to find me
Sticky, yellow poo
Like they always do
And somewhere in the dark there's you

So I'll be there to get you clean
The sight of you means it is not a dream
And when I take you in my arms
And hold you tight
I know it's just another night

Tonight the
Super pooper fumes are going to find me
Rising like the sun
I don't call this fun
How I wish that it were #1
Tonight the
Super pooper fumes are going to find me
Sticky, yellow poo
Like they always do
And somewhere in the dark there's you.

Tribute to Our Roots

Somewhere in the upper limbs of the family tree is found Jefferson Davis, and in tribute (okay, really just because we wanted to do something outdoors and free and had never been there) we visited the Chickamauga Battlefield yesterday. It was the last major victory for the Confederacy, but both sides incurred heavy losses in the two day battle: over 34,000 wounded, killed or mission. (Actually I don't think Davis had any personal connection to this particular battle).

We traversed the 5200 acre park by van and on foot, saw plenty of cannons, and numerous signs and monuments to the various troops who fought and died (over 600 were erected between 1870 and 1910).

My personal opinion on this whole "War of Northern Aggression" mania is that it was over long ago (nearly 150 years) and it is time to realize the South did indeed lose; but seeing as I make my home south of the Mason-Dixon line, I try to keep these sacrilegious thoughts to myself.

Wilder's Monument is an 85 foot tower which we climbed (our legs felt like jello afterwards and we are both hobbling today.

The view from the top

Stephen shooting the enemies

Matthew enjoying freedom from the backpack

While Doug and Andrew played football yesterday afternoon, Stephen moved about on his "baseball motorcycle." Matthew ate grass and practised mastering his newly found skill of crawling.

I went back through Andrew and Stephen's records to see when all this happened before. Andrew crawled right at nine months and walked at 10; Stephen crawled just after 9 months and walked at 11. Seeing as we are just past the 8 month mark, Matthew may be our earliest walker - oh, dear!

The Gospel According to Andrew

Though often misinterpreted and taken out of context, the Lord promises that His Word will not return void - I can't wait to see how He uses this. I was attending to Matthew earlier when Andrew entered bearing his large red & white striped candy cane and we had a conversation that played out as follows:

"And so it was that Jesus traveled along the roads fixing wonky washing machines. And he had a mother named Mary but he was a grown up man. And he took a wrecking ball and knocked down all of the crosses. And then the policeman came along and unscrewed the screws from his hands and feet and then let him ride in the police car and they went zooming away with the lights flashing and the siren going RRRRRRR!"

More sobering was the conversation about the story of Samuel confronting David about his sin. We talked about how David was sorry for his sin and God forgave David, but he was still punished. Stephen asked how David was punished, and I told him that he had a baby that died. He paused and said, "But when we do bad things and get punished, does Matthew get dead?" Thankfully not.

Money Saving Tips: Part Two

I was going to share the recipe and finished product for Dryer Lint Playdough, but seeing as all the lint I could find was full of the boys' hair trimmings and my post-partum fallout, I chose plan #2.

Know a newspaper carrier.

This tip alone has saved me over $63 on coffee in the last 24 hours.

My dad's first cousin Lloyd (my first cousin once removed?) is a penny pincher. Thrifty & frugal, he has been known to paid by the grocery cashier.

Fortunately his job as a newspaper carrier allows him access to the extra coupons and ads. I called him yesterday looking for more of the $1.50 off coupon for New England coffee; I only needed 10 or so. When we went to collect the goods, he had a total of 42.

I had to immediately seize the opportunity as the BOGO sale ended last night. Because Bi-Lo only allows 10 coupons on a single item at a time, I had to stop at two stores, using 20 of the coupons.

"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night" can keep this gal from a grand opening that invariably offers freebies. And so it was, despite the inclement weather, that I loaded up my trio of boys to go to our new Publix.

We strolled through the store, stocking up on coffee (2/$5.79 - coupons = $1.40/ea) and Progresso soup for my parents (3/$4.00 - coupons = $.83/ea). We sampled ham and pineapple, signed up for door prizes, collected giveaways from the pharmacy and local newspaper, and got 2 free reusable totes.

(Doug just doesn't understand my obsession with freebies. I simply love those small hotel samples even though I don't ever use them. Free pencil? Sure. Frisbee? Of course! Koozie? Why not - someday I might remember to use it so my hand doesn't freeze.)

I generally feel pretty bold brandishing my coupon accordian, ready to take on the overpriced grocery stores, eagle eyes ready for BOGO items with additional double coupon savings, eager to spend as little as possible. I must admit I felt a little embarrassed this time. So much so that I was willing to go in twice (thus dividing the number of coupons used).

As if I thought I would be inconspicuous - woman with beautiful baby and balloon in backpack and two small children in tow. One employee even commented, "Weren't you just in here?"

But thanks to my hoarding, we have ample caffeine supplies for the next year. And to celebrate we baked on our own Publix cake.

P.S. If any should need coupons for Progresso soup, Skippy peanut butter, Kleenex, Degree deo (unless you've switched to baking soda), Fruit Roll Ups, canned biscuits, frozen vegetables, Wishbone dressing, Soft Scrub, etc. - I've got plenty!

Money Saving Tips: Part One

In these hard financial times, it is important to save every penny possible. Thankfully I stumbled upon my copy of Super Baby Food (thrift store find by my sister - she warned me the lady was a quack but there was some good info, too). Lest you think this is just an essay on the merits of making one's own baby food rather than purchasing the toss-away jars of pureed vegetables, think again. By purchasing this book, you get a wealth of information beyond the recipe for Super Porridge, the benefits of supplements like brewer's yeast and kelp, and the dangers of having meat in your house.

Under Section B, a busy mother learns she can save money by

• washing Huggies brand baby wipes (just think of the money I could have saved over the last 4 years)
• making a waterproof baby bib out of an old shower curtain (washed in hot water and bleach), duct tape, and velcro.
• constructing a reusable overnight diaper for the not-yet-trained-child: "I folded and placed two or three wipe-up towels, washcloths, or a cotton diaper between his legs inside the underpants, over which I put rubber training pants. Worked just fine for those nights when my son had an accident, and I figure I saved the better part of a dollar each time. By the way, I had to put this contraption on him after he had fallen fast asleep." Yeah, I bet he woke up in the morning and exclaimed, "What in the world happened!"
• making hairspray by mixing "sticky ingredients into water: lemon juice, honey, corn syrup or even Elmer's glue! (I think you could save a step and just let your child eat pancakes with syrup and then rub their hands through your hair).
• forgetting deodorant: "I believe that deodorant isn't necessary at all, except maybe on hot sticky days. Plain baking soda will keep you dry and comfortable. Sprinkle about 1/2 teaspoon onto your palm and smooth it under your arm. (I think I'll replace Doug's deo with Arm & Hammer and see what happens).
• making knee pads for a crawling baby from the cuffs of an adult's socks. "Make yourself a similar pads with old socks and sponges or shoulder pads." (Maybe this could be the next accessory in a Kellys Kids catalog).
• not buying outlet covers: "Remove the cover...place electrical tape over the slits...replace the cover. The disadvantage of this method, of course, is that you cannot plug an appliance in this outlet." (Another excuse not to vacuum).

Some other more useful ideas include:

• keeping unopened ketchup packs in the freezer to use as icepacks for small boo-boos (on more than one occasion I have used a rubber band to hold one onto a burn on my fingers).
• buying cheap washcloths at the local box store to use for cleaning up baby after meals (I got something like 15 for $3, use them all day/every day, and can easily bleach them).

I don't want to share too many of my goodies just yet. I'll leave you waiting with bated breath.

Weekend Happenings

I survived last week and decided that I have too much invested in these kiddos to return them. Amidst the chaos, we did have fun. Suzy, Craig and Colin, our former neighbors turned jet setters who now make their home in Switzerland returned to the US for a few weeks and dropped by for a visit. The boys spent the morning alternating between eating and playing (mostly with large sticks). Although Andrew was a little disappointed that they had not returned with their entire playroom of toys, he was comforted with a new big rig from Ms. Suzy (THANKS!)

We took advantage of the fall weather over the weekend and took a short trip to Lafayette, GA for the Marsh House Harvest Days. It was a smallish event but there were Civil War cannon demonstrations, a period regimental band and kettle corn.



Matthew doesn't crawl but he can move. Not fast which is good for me, but he somehow manages to move. Sit. Stretch. Swivel. He's also expanded his food horizons to include puffed millet (which looks like small styrofoam balls) and Oatios (a wheat-free Cheerio-type cereal).

The epitome of brotherly love. Sunday afternoon we waded in the creek, threw rocks, and cracked open walnuts; I almost caught a newt but it slipped through my hands (sorry ol' Fink-Nottle).

Mailorder Kids

I wish I had purchased my children from L.L.Bean:

Easy Returns and Exchanges
At L.L.Bean, your satisfaction is always guaranteed. We know it's sometimes necessary to return or exchange an item.We want to make it easy. No authorization from customer service is required when making a return or exchange.

It's been one of those weeks. Actually, Monday was a great day. Our routine flowed smoothly. I did laundry and cooked dinner; the boys played outside nicely. We watched city workers replace a broken sewer line on our street. Then came Tuesday...and Wednesday...and Thursday.

Andrew has diarrhea. Mind you, he is not suffering. It is of the verbal variety, and I am the one who pays. From the time he arose at 6:30 'til Doug left at 8:00, he did not stop talking - no exaggeration. This continued all day. The oratory overflow was coupled with uncontrollable excitement due to visitors coming. A double whammy that has left me completely drained.

Matthew, the sweet baby, has finally awakened from his eight month slumber. I've never experienced the joy of having a child who slept a lot, and a joy it was. I thought maybe he was understanding enough to realize that I couldn't quite manage three needy kiddos and therefore decided that it was probably safer and more enjoyable to just happily stay put in the crib.

This was all before he came to the conclusion that somehow his brothers were able to go from one place to another, often at rapid speeds. Considering that achieving such feats must require a good deal of practice, he has been trading sleep for training. He pushes and scoots, rocks to his knees and rocks back. (One day he was left in Andrew's care for 5 minutes, and upon my return I found him 5-6 feet away from the starting position. I still don't know if he managed it on his own or had some help.) The added exercise has increased his appetite and interrupted my sleep.

And speaking of sleep (or the lack thereof), the two aforementioned children are completely messed up. Andrew has gone to bed at 6 pm (literally fallen asleep at the table) only to awaken before 5 am. Not content to be alone at such an early hour, he visits us, we send him back to his room, and he awakens Stephen. Similarly, Matthew's naps have not been in sync with our scheduled afternoon rest. Andrew could certainly do without and Stephen can if he has to, but it is in everyone's best interest if I have some time alone.

And then there is Stephen. I still can't make up my mind on him. He's earned and lost his big rig (a reward for successfully completely #2 in the appropriate place) several times this week. He occasionally regresses to babyhood, wanting to be rocked or requesting a cup with handles. He is, however, the comic relief to all this madness. At bedtime Doug read about King Saul. "It's kind of like 'sawing.'"

In the end, I guess I'll keep them. I'm sure it would cost too much to send them back.