Conversations

The boys received a package in the mail last week and as Stephen and Matthew attempted to open it, I heard Andrew mutter, "I hope it isn't shoes."

Stephen and Matthew were supposed to be sharing a bag of pretzels but Matthew seemed to be taking more than his share.  Stephen declared, "You are being selfish!" to which Matthew matter-of-factly replied, "Yes, I am."

For some reason, Stephen announced that he was no longer going to talk to me; he was only going to talk to Andrew.  "Is that a promise?" I asked.  He was silent for a moment and then said, "Um, probably not."

I always have to cruise through the dead-and-dying plants at Lowe's to see what I can find, and as I perused the boys were asking about the names of various plants.  "That's 'spirea'," I told them.  Surprised, Matthew exclaims in his loudest voice, "Diarrhea?  There's a plant named 'Diarrhea'!  Diarrhea plant!  Diarrhea plant!"

Overheard

The boys were playing with their CARS vehicles this morning when I caught the following explanation by Andrew:

"Well, there are two The Kings: one is Richard Petty and one is Jesus Christ, but Jesus is the most important."

Praying by Faith

Stephen appeared earlier today and asked if they could open the windows in their bedroom.

"What?" (seeing as it is in the 20s).

"Well, Andrew prayed to God that our CARS vehicles would come alive tonight, and we need to allow the exhaust to escape out the window."

Apparently our newest chapter book, The Indian in the Cupboard, has made quite an impression.  We compromised: I told them if the CARS do in fact come to life, they have my permission to open the window.

Conversations

Thoughts from Andrew today:

A:  I think Stephen is like the Holy Spirit.

J:  Oh, really.  Why?

A:  Because he comes upon me suddenly when I don't see him.

Later....

A:  Don't you think it's funny that there is a place where cotton balls can train.

J:  (Totally puzzled look).  I'm not sure what you mean.

A:  Well, you know: a cotton gym.

Still Here

I think my brain is turning to sludge.

Every conversation of  late has incorporated NASCAR, peanuts and/or hotdogs.

"Why?" you may ask.  I wish I knew.

I usually just respond with "underwear" which sends them into fits and leaves me shaking my head.

Outwitted

The toddler needed soothing after a post-nap funk and was allowed to watch a few minutes of John Deere.

The big boys needed fresh air and exercise and were sent outside, much to their dismay.

But they are intelligent and resourceful boys.  They figured out a way to be outdoors and get their TV fix.

Backwards Boy

From the backwards shirts to the mixed up shoes,

from the silly faces and amusing comments,

this kid is always good for a laugh!

"Tomorrow You Will Laugh"

...Or so my husband assures me.  This after one of those moments that will go down in family history.

It was almost dinnertime.  The boys (all four of them) were in the bedroom playing peacefully, and I was assembling dinner.  Having looked at the pan of vegetable scraps for nearly 24 hours, I decided to seize the moment to carry it out to the compost bin.  Out and in - as simple as that.

Upon my return, I was met with a group of confused and excited faces, and the loud declaration, "Matthew pooped." 

Matthew, in the midst of diaper training and therefore bare-bottomed, was apparently unable to get from his room to the bathroom, thus leaving a trail down the hallway.  Pleasant thought, right?

Wait, there's more.

Apparently the older boys sensed his urgency and followed him down the hall.  Then he was followed by Jonathan.  Who doesn't crawl on his knees.  He slithers.  Joy, oh, joy!

It doesn't stop there.

I also need to note that Jonathan consumes anything he finds in the floor.
(I'll pause while you find a trashcan.)

The two little guys got baths, and then I parked them all on the couch to watch Thomas while I donned my hazmat suit.  One of Doug's old t-shirts got recycled; there was much use of vinegar and lemon oil drops.  Doug made it home just as I was finishing up (convenient timing, eh?) but he still got to experience the lovely aroma.

All is well, and indeed it was quite funny in a way.  The thought occurred to me to take pictures, but it's not really something I need to be reminded of visually, and I'm sure you'll take my word for it.

The only really disappointing thing is that I really loved Jonathan's open-mouth-slobbery-kisses;  I just can't quite view them in the same manner anymore.

Future Interrogator

Last night Stephen was asking Andrew about a particular character's name in a book, but the only response he got was a silly laugh.  As he was growing more and more frustrated at the lack of a response, I said, "Andrew, that's not very nice." 

Then Stephen came up with a solution: "We could just hit him and then he will tell us."

Only Stephen

It seems Jonathan was in need of a little digestive help so he was served prunes for dinner. As we all sat around the dinner table Stephen remarked, "That looks like what it's supposed to do to him."

I'll be sure to add Polite Conversation Material to our schoolwork next year.

Overheard: Insults

Andrew: You are a zwieback crumb!

Stephen: You are a headless baby!

If this is as bad as it gets, I'm thankful for the sheltered life they lead.